The young couple at McDonald's...

My middle-school aged daughter had cheer-leading practice tonight until 7. She is growing so fast. Six years ago she was in first grade. Five years before that she was a babe in my arms. I was overwhelmed just looking at her. I still am. Six years from now will be graduation. At least one of us is getting older far too quick.

To pass the time until her practice was over I went to a nearby McDonald's. As I sat alone reading a newspaper and finishing a diet coke a young dad came in with his two small children, and sat at a table near mine. The children, a boy and girl, appeared to be two and three years old and excited about being out with dad. Leaving the children at the table dad went to the counter to place their order, as their mother came in unseen. She bent low, and slowly came up behind the children's seat. As she popped her head up from behind them the children started laughing and shouting "Mommy, Mommy!" She hugged them as they shouted to their dad at the counter that "Mommy's here!" Dad sat down with their food and there, in a fast food restaurant, was a perfect table.

I wanted to walk over and tell them to cherish this moment; to breathe it in and don't exhale. I wanted those young parents to know that after they left that night NOTHING in the future was going to equal knowing that that night, in that place, they were the most important people in the world to their children. I wanted to tell them how wonderful those little hugs of joy are, and how fragile time is. I wanted my 17 year old step son to be two again and happy to see me. I wanted to be lifting my little girl up on Daddy's shoulders for a walk through the flea market her mother had to take us to. I wanted to hear her singing the alphabet in the back seat of the car on her second birthday and telling me the reason she could sing it so well was because she was "older now - like a woman". I wanted again to laugh at that because then we knew her "being a woman" was closer to twenty years instead of the now less than ten.

I wanted to tell the young couple at McDonald's all those things, but I didn't tell them anything at all. I wish I had. I wish someone had told me. And if they did I wish I had listened closer.

Christmas For Christ's Sake

Every year in our culture we find a great struggle against Christmas. Groups like the ACLU, and others, have somehow come to the conclusion that public displays of Christianity, in a nation that is at its core founding Christian, are somehow offensive. The terms"toleration and sensitivity" have come to mean that if you are Christian you must tolerate everyone else's whims about what you believe, and how you express it. Should a Christian expect some sort of reciprocation for all this tolerance and sensitivity then the Christian is, of course, being "intolerant". Christmas vacation in public schools becomes “winter holiday” as Christmas songs about Jesus are banned from the school choir. Businesses who don’t mind making money from Christians think twice about saying “Merry Christmas”, and the Salvation Army is not allowed to collect for the needy at some department stores. Some towns that have Christmas displays will allow nothing in those “Christmas” displays about Christ.

I could look for cultural reasons as to why there is this yearly hostility from "the world", or unbelievers, to Christmas but at its heart is a very basic and biblical reason. Mankind does not do not like to think about God. The problem the unbelieving world has with the "baby" Jesus is He didn't stay that way. He was God incarnate and grew into a Man, and then you have to do something with Him. Believe or don't believe. Accept of reject. To acknowledge the Child at Christmas is to set your feet on the path for Easter. Fictional elves in December, and bunnies in April still do not hide THE REASON. THE REASON is always there whether spoken or not. Best, from a hostile secular stance, to wash the whole thing from public view.

Add to this the sincere belief of some Christians that the Christmas celebration is pagan, and the unbelieving world is closer to getting a wish it tries (and tries and tries) to have the other 11 months of the year - no public acknowledgment of Christ. Out of sight and out of mind.

For those believers who have wondered about the points of paganism that are brought up at this time of year - make no mistake; the struggle against Christmas is against Christianity, not paganism.

I spent a few years struggling with Christmas. I attended a church with brothers and sisters that I loved, and love still, that supposedly didn’t celebrate Christmas. Every December we were somehow at odds with the “lie” of Christmas. Still, some of those I knew that said they didn’t celebrate Christmas had another day in January where they exchanged gifts – Christmas with another name and date, but no tree - a day in January that surely would not have been chosen had there not been a Dec 25 just a week before. I don't believe those who "chose the alternative day" saw it that way, nor had anything but pure motives, but quite honestly I couldn't see it any other way. Eventually my own hypocrisy and double talk in December of trying not to celebrate something that had so much potential, as well as history, for sharing Christ became too overwhelming for me even several years before I left that church.

First I think we have to acknowledge the criticisms that have merit, and above all what the scripture says, and what it does not say.

Jesus was not born Dec 25. Some claim He was born in October which might be plausible but no one knows for sure. We do know He was born in Bethlehem, and angels announced His Birth to shepherds in the field, and they found the Child lying in a manger. The wise men did not come to the stable, but found the child in “the house” when he may have been as old as two. While we know the wise men brought three gifts the bible does not say there were three wise men so their number is undetermined.

The scripture in Jeremiah 10 DOES NOT describe a Christmas tree, although if the chapter were to stop at verse 5 it would seem so. Reading the rest of the chapter makes it clear that Jeremiah is referring to a wooden idol worshiped as a god. –

“But they are altogether dull-hearted and foolish; A wooden idol is a worthless doctrine. Silver is beaten into plates; It is brought from Tarshish, And gold from Uphaz, The work of the craftsman And of the hands of the metalsmith; Blue and purple are their clothing; They are all the work of skillful men.” –Jeremiah 10:8-9

While various kinds of trees were decorated in pagan times the Christmas tree as we know it did not appear until the 1500’s.

Santa Claus is not what is referenced in Revelation 2 in connection with the “Nicolaitans”. The Nicolaitans believed that Christian liberty was excuse for adultery, and fornication, and other carnality. They were self-indulgent and believed they were lords over others.

Santa Claus is derived, in part, from a real life figure in the 4^th century Saint Nicholas of Myra ( hence his association with Christianity), but the fanciful toy making fictional character we know today has almost as little to do with that historical person as with Odin or any other pagan origin. While living in the North Pole with toy making elves and flying reindeer has much to do with marketing, and nothing to do with the gospel, it is more modern myth than ancient ritual. I prefer that we concentrate on the biblical account of Christ's birth – the part that seems to upset everyone.

History reveals that some of the criticisms people state authoritatively as facts aren’t quite as certain as they believe. It is said that Dec 25 was originally a day of celebration during the winter solstice, and was adopted by the catholic church (it is called Christ-mass after all) as a way of “Christianizing” the day. December 25 was the day of the winter solstice created under Julius Caesar in 45 B.C., yet contrary to what is widely held there was no religious connotation to the day. Some argue the date of December 25 was the result an attempt by early Christians, pre-dating Catholicism, to figure out when Jesus was born before there was the thought of the celebration, or a name given the day. In fact the Roman Emperor Aurelian designated the day as a “festival of the Unconquered Sun” as a way of undermining the early Christians. There is much history about it, and an informative read recommended by Albert Mohler about the date of December 25 can be found in a Touchstone article titled Calculating Christmas by William J. Tighe.

The historian in part writes-

Thus, December 25th as the date of the Christ’s birth appears to owe nothing whatsoever to pagan influences upon the practice of the Church during or after Constantine’s time. It is wholly unlikely to have been the actual date of Christ’s birth, but it arose entirely from the efforts of early Latin Christians to determine the historical date of Christ’s death.

And the pagan feast which the Emperor Aurelian instituted on that date in the year 274 was not only an effort to use the winter solstice to make a political statement, but also almost certainly an attempt to give a pagan significance to a date already of importance to Roman Christians. The Christians, in turn, could at a later date re-appropriate the pagan “Birth of the Unconquered Sun” to refer, on the occasion of the birth of Christ, to the rising of the “Sun of Salvation” or the “Sun of Justice.”

So is the celebration, or the way of celebrating, pagan? The Puritans, and others have refused the celebration in part because they considered it part of the Catholicism they were separating from, and because some also did indeed make the day an excuse for drunken parties. It is the same now whether the day is Christmas or Derby day if you live in Kentucky, or Super Bowl Sunday, etc. Those looking for a reason for revelry always find one. Whether the celebrating of Christmas in particular is holy or “pagan” I think depends upon whom is doing the celebrating and how. To be sure I don’t believe anyone, Christian or non-Christian, is celebrating Saturnalia. A Christian, even if the date is unsure, is celebrating a historical event – the birth of Christ. An unbeliever who does not consider Christ any other time is celebrating what has become a cultural event more than anything else, with Christian trimmings, but with no thought of false gods or rituals - until a well meaning Christian gives him, or her, reason not to consider Jesus at this time of year either. For each, the Christian and the non-Christian, much of the day consists of what they bring to it. Those who do not wish to celebrate have a case for paganism if they concentrate on celebration similarities to the exclusion of differences. The pagans did not seek to use the trappings of any of their celebrations to bring to mind the Christ Who came into the world. I am aware of no pagan festival that had at its core, whatever the decorations, this recounting of Christ’s birth by Angels-

And behold, an angel of the Lord stood before them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were greatly afraid Then the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid, for behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy which will be to all people. For there is born to you this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord. And this will be the sign to you: You will find a Babe wrapped in swaddling cloths, lying in a manger.” And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying: “ Glory to God in the highest, And on earth peace, goodwill toward men!” Luke 2:9-14

If we are going to stop recognizing things because there may be pagan counterparts in history we are going to find that being similar to a thing is not the same as being a thing. That other religions have had ark stories does not mean there was no Noah. In history there are other religions that had stories of virgin births, but that in no way dissuades me from what really happened in a stable one night in Bethlehem. That others have had pieces of a puzzle that resembles my completed frame does not mean I have been sold the same picture.

We could go beyond similarities to daily holdovers from ancient times and come up with new days of the week as the names we know and use are derived from Rome. We’ll need new names for the months of the year for the same reason. Now we could argue that no one holds religious meanings to these things any longer, and that would be correct, but that is exactly the point about the Saturnalia festival that has also been associated with Dec 25 – even though apparently at a later date than some believe. It is nothing more than a name in History. We have no problems recognizing Sunday (named for the sun and not the Son) as the first day of the week as the day the Living Son rose from the dead, and we do it without falling into paganism though that is where the “name” for the day originates. How do we do this? We as Christians recognize there is One true God who made all days for Himself, no matter what the day is called.

Is there a biblical mandate to celebrate the Lord’s birth? No. Nor is there a biblical mandate to celebrate our births, or our children’s, though many of us do. Is there anything wrong with concentrating on the those aspects of a celebration that for centuries has used scriptural accounts of His birth to prayerfully make others aware of Who He Is, and what He accomplished? I would prefer Holiday celebrations be individual matters of conscience instead of a test of faithfulness. Were false gods in reality being celebrated I hope I would be the first to chuck the whole thing, but as God as cleansed me, someone who once behaved like a pagan, I believe any day (and all days are His) can be cleansed and used for His glory. Days are subject to God, and not the other way around.

No one in the Christianized world (I would almost dare say the WHOLE world) believes in the pagan god Saturn, nor has Saturnalia in mind. Even if the celebration were pagan (and history indicates that part has been exaggerated) I ask myself what the Apostle Paul would do with the day? Paul took opportunity in Acts 17 of an Athenian altar that was simply inscribed “To The Unknown God” and proclaimed Jesus! How much more would Paul, in my opinion, have taken advantage of a day that many perceive be about Jesus already and proclaim the truth of Who Jesus is? A day rich in centuries of Christian symbolism, and beautiful music (obviously I am not speaking of music of the “Rudolph” variety but “O Come O Come Immanuel”, “Silent Night”; “Joy To The World”, etc) that’s purpose is to glorify God. I think Paul would have used the day to tell others about Jesus.

Much of what I have heard, or read, that others use for proof text of the paganism of Christmas comes from a book called “The Two Babylon’s” by Alexander Hislop, with this being their only, or main source. I read the book several years ago. His primary idea was that the Catholic Church was ancient Babylonian religion with a different name, and that is where the catholic rituals find their origination. Hislop contends that the paganism roads all lead to Nimrod. Nimrod is mentioned in passing 4 times in scripture. Hislop’s contentions have been noted for their lack of evidence.

The real issue in this is not idol worship as none are being worshiped. The issue is not worshipping a day as a day is not being worshiped. A very real issue in this is LIBERTY. Liberty from trying to prove ones relationship with God by keeping a day or, as in this case, by not keeping a day. The implication in much of the “Christmas is pagan” speech is that we have gained something, or have something to gain, with God by our efforts of not celebrating a day. The thought is that we can make ourselves more holy by doing something rather than trusting Someone. My walk with God is not determined by a day, or a food, or anything except what Jesus has done at Calvary. He who observes Christmas, and he who does not, has hope only in the same Person – Jesus Christ. Were I surrounded by decorated trees in the midst of the most vile temples of paganism, were I named after a Roman Caesar, and were every day known as “Saturn” day it would have no affect upon who I am in Christ, because He is greater than all things and has made all things for Himself. My righteousness is bound only in Him, and it is expressed by walking in the Fruit of the Spirit, not being bound one way or the other to a superstition of “days”.

The attitude towards Christmas, or any similar holiday, should be as the one Paul expressed in Romans 14:5-6 when speaking of Sabbath days – “One person esteems one day above another; another esteems every day alike. Let each be fully convinced in his own mind. He who observes the day, observes it to the Lord; and he who does not observe the day, to the Lord he does not observe it.”

Freedom.

Christmas is an opportunity legitimately afforded us by history to let people know, however they celebrate or don’t celebrate, that the Christ has come into the world to die that they might have life. I say avoid the distortions and use the day.

Proclaiming His Gospel does not dishonor Him.

Faddish Faith

Always something to distract the eyes of the church away from the simplicity of Christ. Some distractions are well meaning, some about nothing more than money. The latest, and I don't know into which motive category it falls - is Godmen. Before that is Experiencing God, The Purpose Driven Life, The Prayer of Jabez, Promise Keepers, Left Behind, etc, etc, going back to 88 Reasons Why the Rapture Could Be in 1988, and before ad nauseum. Not that all these things are completely void of good motive ( though some are) but it is the faddish aspect of these "movements" that disturbs me most I think. Instead of genuine moves of God much is just so much marketing using Christian lingo, but somehow adding a new twist. THIS move, THIS book, THIS teaching is for today, and always marketed in such a way as to be understood that the Christian of today is missing out if he, or she, does not participate in the latest "wave" of God.

Problem for me in all the new takes on promoting the gospel is the text says what it has always said. Those whom God has chosen are still brought into the fold by the same thing - the preaching of the gospel- Jesus died for sinners. We are still strenghtend by the same thing - a daily walk with Christ. Nothing replaces time spent in reading scriptures and prayer in the life of a believer.

It seems to me in our culture that too many people don't read their bible, and become susceptible to the marketing schemes that use biblical "language".

Are there things of value in some of the books, or events that get promoted in Christendom as the next big thing? Sure, sometimes, but we have to be familiar with the scriptures, and have a relationship with the Lord for ourselves, to discern what is beneficial, and what is simply commercial.

Godmen for example. The article about it in Newsweek says of the event attended by the reporter - "Inside, strobe lights flashed, and tracks by the Killers thumped from speakers stacked on either side of a stage. Four large video screens showed clips of karate fights, car chases and "Jackass"-style stunts."

How did Jesus ever preach the Sermon on the Mount without this?

And I know I'm just being an old fashioned prude and all, although I am only 42, but why is it that language we once wouldn't have normally used, lest we distract from hearing the real message by its intentional crudeness, is now ok to use if the gathering is for just one sex? Consider this from a, I am sure, well meaning brother -

“A lot of guys out there wouldn’t have the balls to be here,” he shouted. “Are you ready to be a man? Are you ready to kick ass? Are you ready to grab your sword and say, ‘OK family, I’m going to lead you?’ Buckle up. This is GodMen!”

Are stunts and trash talk really the way to "inject masculinity" into our Christianity? Is this even considered trash talk anymore? Am I the only person left who views such speech in public crude and irreverent when employed to teach of the goodness of Christ? Is this speech with grace, seasoned with salt? How about leading the family by living the example of a humble life, in word and deed, before God?

Is Christianity really not masculine, or is that accusation a marketing ploy for this "next big thing"? Jesus, Paul, Peter, John: anyone really believe these men were not masculine? One Man the Son of God, beaten and crucified, and resurrected. The others imprisoned, beaten and martyred for their faith. These were MEN standing in the righteousness of God. I tell you that a man is not drawn to stunts for anything but the spectacle, and a spectacle is fine for fluff as far as that goes, but if we really want to draw men into the church let us concentrate on truly manly characteristics of love, courage, righteousness. Set the example of Christ before us and let us know His ideal of an honest Godly life is attainable by the power of His character being formed within as He lives in us!

Nothing attracts, nothing draws the chosen (men and women) like the message of the cross, and the love of the Man who died in our place. That message - pure and without distraction - makes me want to live my life as He who died in my place would have me live it. It makes me want to be a better husband, and dad. It makes me want to be a better.......man.

The gospel only need be presented as it truly is and there is a simplicity and beauty to the life of Christ that those who are the chosen will heed. The faith will stand on its own. I fear the emphasis on tools of entertainment devised to bring others to a place to hear preaching have become a goal within themselves. "Preaching" of the gospel, once the goal, is traded for pep talks that bring no growth in Christ, and in fact promote life as it always been with a Christian label. The gospel is the only thing that changes hearts and to accomplish that it must be unashamedly heard! "How then shall they call on him in whom they have not believed? and how shall they believe in him of whom they have not heard? and how shall they hear without a preacher? And how shall they preach, except they be sent? as it is written, How beautiful are the feet of them that preach the gospel of peace, and bring glad tidings of good things!"

Fads and causes pass, and a faddish borne faith may well pass too.

But a son, or daughter, drawn by the Father is home forever.

Edward Lee Pittman, age 75, Harrodsburg, widower of Jessie Pearl Broughton Pittman, died Sunday, October 22, 2006 at the Haggin Memorial Hospital, Harrodsburg, KY.

Born July 29, 1931 in Mercer County, KY, he was the son of the late Clarence and Louise (Lyons) Pittman. He served this country during the Korean war in the Army.

He worked for General Electric in the shipping and receiving department. Ed was a member of the Immanuel Baptist Church where he served as a Deacon. He was also a member of the Masonic Lodge in Louisville and the Model A Club.

Survivors include: two daughters: Teresa Lopez of Harrodsburg, KY and Elaine Hoskins of Louisville, KY; one son: John Pittman of Harrodsburg, KY; four sisters: Alice and Irene Baker both of Harrodsburg, KY, Gladys Ransdell of Salvisa, KY and Jessie Devine of Burgin, KY; two brothers: Jimmy Pittman and Clarence Pittman Jr. of Harrodsburg, KY; Six Grandchildren ; Five great grandchildren. He was predeceased by a son: Edward V. Lay and two brothers: Marion Pittman and A.C. Pittman.

Funeral services will be conducted 11:00 AM, Wednesday, October 25 at the Immanuel Baptist Church by Randy McPheron and Harold Best.

My Father-in law passed away a week ago today. He was a man who loved the Lord, and he will be missed. He has my gratitude for my wife and children, and his memory will live as a good one.

God bless you Brother Edward, until we meet again.

Let all mortal flesh keep silence

Let all mortal flesh keep silence,
And with fear and trembling stand;
Ponder nothing earthly minded,
For with blessing in His hand,
Christ our God to earth descendeth,
Our full homage to demand.

King of kings, yet born of Mary,
As of old on earth He stood,
Lord of lords, in human vesture,
In the body and the blood;
He will give to all the faithful
His own self for heavenly food.

Rank on rank the host of heaven
Spreads its vanguard on the way,
As the Light of light descendeth
From the realms of endless day,
That the powers of hell may vanish
As the darkness clears away.

At His feet the six wingèd seraph,
Cherubim with sleepless eye,
Veil their faces to the presence,
As with ceaseless voice they cry:
Alleluia, Alleluia
Alleluia, Lord Most High!

Words: Li­tur­gy of St. James, 4th Cen­tu­ry
Tarnslated from Greek to English by Gerard Moultrie, 1864

What my Grandmother saved, what I lost, what by God's mercy was found again

What is important in someone's life? For my Grandmother it was her family. Going through her things my mother found a letter that I wrote to my Grandmother in 1970. I was in the first grade. I am moved that she kept it, and wonder at how indicative it is of what mattered - family.

I have a habit of keeping papers in my Bible. This is not always the most fool proof method of keeping papers safe because I have been known to lose a Bible now and then, once by driving away with it on top of the car after church. Since my Bible was handy however I put the letter in it's pages with the intention of taking it out later to scan into my PC, and then storing in a better place. This past Sunday before church I discovered the letter was not in my Bible, and did not know how long it had been gone! As I sat in church that morning I could think of nothing but how much the letter had meant to my Grandmother to keep all those years, and how I had lost it in a matter of weeks after her death! I was praying it would be found, and told my wife that I was going to leave the service a moment to check the Lost and Found at church. There it lay! unharmed, intact, and out front was the letter! Thank you Lord!

It is scanned now, and resides in my great-grandmother's ( my grandmother's mother's) Bible. safe from movement inside another family heirloom that means much to me. It means much to know that I meant that much to her.

Betty June Proffitt February 2 1927 - July 16 2006

BETTY J. NAPIER PROFFITT, AGE 79 OF CRAB ORCHARD, KENTUCKY PASSED AWAY ON SUNDAY, JULY 16, 2006 AT THE EPHRAIM MCDOWELL HOSPITAL IN DANVILLE.

SHE WAS THE WIDOW OF GORDON PROFFITT. SHE WAS BORN FEBRUARY 2, 1927 IN LINCOLN COUNTY TO THE LATE LEANDER AND POLLY HENSLEY NAPIER.

SURVIVORS INCLUDE:
SON, JAMES D. PROFFITT OF SHEPERDSVILLE, KY
DAUGHTER, JANET FRAZIER OF CRAB ORCHARD, KY
BROTHER, SAM NAPIER OF AMELIA, OH
BROTHER, CHESTER COMBS OF BEREA, KY
9 GRANDCHILDREN
13 GREAT GRANDCHILDREN
4 GREAT GREAT GRANDCHILDREN

BETTY WAS PRECEEDED IN DEATH BY HER PARENTS LEANDER & POLLY HENSLEY NAPIER, HER HUSBAND GORDON PROFFITT, AND A BROTHER, LEE NAPIER


My grandmother passed away Sunday evening. I preached the funeral Wednesday.

She had been ill with emphysema for several years, and about 6 weeks ago she fell and broke a hip. She spent a couple of weeks in the hospital, where a couple of blood clots were also found in her lung. She was sent home a couple of Thursdays ago, and we knew she would not live long.




When ever I spoke with her over the past few months she seemed content to go, but it is hard to say goodbye even when you know it is coming.

When I was 7 months old I pulled a boiling percolator of coffee on to myself. I have borne the scars all my life, and bear them still. My Grandmother blistered her hands tearing the clothes from me, and putting me under a cold faucet. The doctor, who said I should have died, said this was that was the best thing that could have been done for me. Were it not for her quick actions, and the mercy of God, I would not be here.



I spoke with her before she passed about the Lord, and our confidence is in Him. I believe the Lord covered the funeral, and it went as well as a funeral can go. I spoke of how much she meant to us, and the great mercy found only in Jesus. Several folks let me know they were comforted, and I was even asked by someone if I would consider traveling to Michigan to preach. I don't know if anything will come of it, but it was nice to be asked.

Truth is -it was God. As I prayed I said Lord if you don't minister there will be no ministry. Thank God He covered us.

We love you Mamaw.

He will make my feet like deers feet...

Sometimes it seems that life has a way of moving from one "crisis" to the next. Crisis is probably a bit too strong for some things, but my point is I find that I am always looking for the smooth path, but keep finding myself barefoot on one strewn with craggly rocks, or at least really irritating gravel. Recent weeks have been a mixture of both.

First the rocks, or more aptly a very heavy and hard rock. My stepson, the boy I have raised as my own since he was 2, in the past couple of months has gone to live with his natural father. He is 16 now, and I can't say that I am all that surprised the day came. When he was young I suspected that one day it would, I just wish it had come about differently.

While I was at work late one night he asked his mother if he could go somewhere, and she said no. He didn't like her answer, lost his temper,and became very disrespectful. My wife called me home from work crying, and when I got to the house the young mans dad was already there, and our son was packing. Of course I was not happy with the way he had spoken to, and treated his mother. That he wanted to live with his dad, something he has never done, was no surprise but I would have preferred, and told him so, that he had just calmly said that was what he wanted to do instead of making it seem that he left one day because he didn't get his way about something. I'm sure living with his dad was something he had naturally thought of at times, and perhaps the anger of the moment was his catalyst for bringing it about.

The rules at his dads are different than ours, and he probably has more freedom to run a bit. That is a bit of a concern to us, but he has a good heart, and his dad has his best interest in mind, so we are not really concerned for his physical safety or anything. It is just difficult to relinquish responsibility for a child you have lovingly cared for and watched grow. He is only 30 minutes away, but we miss him. He calls his mother regularly, for which I am glad, and also speaks to his sister- our daughter. When he speaks to me things are fine, but he doesn't call me specifically. I was disappointed on Fathers Day when there was no call. I didn't expect a gift, but I thought he might call.

"Stepdad" is not an easy thing to be. I wouldn't trade being that to him, but if either he, or his sister, were to tell me one day they were thinking of marrying someone with a child I would have to seriously counsel them to consider the cost. As a step parent you will always be, and I guess rightfully so if a natural parent is still in the picture, in second place. Sometimes it feels like a distant second place. That is not to say that step-parenting is without its rewards of love and seeing a child grow and trying to be an influence for good, but it is not easy. I married his mother when he was 2. I love the boy. I could have used that phone call.

Our daughter, my little pride and joy, hasn't said much about her brother leaving. She has a way of internalizing things but she seems ok, although I know she misses him desperately. Since school is out she is spending more time on her piano lessons, and she's been decorating her bedroom. She remains a bright spot for her mother and me in the midst of so many other things happening at once.

My fatherinlaws health continues to be precarious as we are told that his heart is functioning at 10%. My grandmother for the past several months appears to have given up on life as she has told me several time that her "race is run". Two weeks ago she fell and broke a hip. She has been in the hospital since, and not at all doing well. She is, quite simply, dying. She knows this, but is not upset about it. While she seems content to go, it is difficult for her children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren to know that a good-bye is coming.

The irritating gravel has been around too. I bought a new PC with the intention of paying it off quickly but the very next week my car developed problems which required money I had put back for vacation. Now the "quick"payments I had intended for the computer are put off as I try to find money to put back for vacation. My wife's van is in terrible shape, and the air-conditioning fan on my car quit yesterday.

Two years ago I was involved in what I thought was a minor car accident in a restaurant parking lot, but I find that I am now being sued. The insurance company has provided a lawyer, but we have never been involved in anything like this, and my wife ( even though I am the one being sued) is stressed with this happening along with everything else. I guess I tend to be too sometimes.

So life keeps happening and I find the road of late not smooth very often. We are not starving, and we are healthy, and there are folks much worse off than we and while this reads like I am complaining I suppose I am really just venting. As I try to find meaning in the rough spots, and what God would develop in me, I remind myself of Habakuk 3:19

The LORD God is my strength; He will make my feet like deers feet, And He will make me walk on my high hills.

I know that climbing the high hills is what puts strength in our legs, and builds character. I am promised that I am never alone, and that He is my strength. In the midst of our trials we are family that loves each other, and we have good friends. The Lord is good, and will see us through these things. When we are weak He is strong. During these times I know that I am very weak.

His Grace is sufficient.

All My Tears (Be Washed Away)

When I go don't cry for me
In my fathers arms I'll be
The wounds this world left on my soul
Will all be healed and I'll be whole
Sun and moon will be replaced
With the light of Jesus' face
And I will not be ashamed
For my savior knows my name

It don't matter where you bury me
I'll be home and I'll be free
It don't matter where I lay
All my tears be washed away

Gold and silver blind the eye
Temporary riches lie
Come and eat from heaven's store
Come and drink and thirst no more
So weep not for me my friend
When my time below does end
For my life belongs to him
Who will raise the dead again

It don't matter where you bury me
I'll be home and I'll be free
It don't matter where I lay
All my tears be washed away

lyrics by Julie Miller, and recorded by Emmylou Harris

Dear Father..

Dear Heavenly Father,

It has been more than 7 months, August 05, since we left our church of 14 years. I do not sleep well most of the time. The church was small but we genuinely loved everyone. We do not seem to be greatly missed. The Pastor made it a point to call me two times since we left - the last time being September 05. We hardly have heard from anyone.

I feel isolated and alone. I know You are with us, and I ever look to you. You know my heart better than myself, and my trust is ever in You. You are God and there is no other. I need to know where we belong.

While I have answered freely anyone who has asked I have not sought out people to speak to about the place we left, nor volunteered the several reasons behind our leaving. I spoke with two couples in my band. Only when asked directly about it have I spoken to anyone else, although I have been spoken about, and publicly referenced on their website - a website that I established. I was not mentioned by name, but those who read understood as did that I was being referenced, and inferred as having been "purged" from the church.

It is hard O God to begin again. I feel guilty for having stayed as long as we did when it is so evident that we have not belonged for several years now. Leaving has been good for our 16 year old. There was no youth group for him where we were, nor was he included in anything. Even when the other two or three teenagers at church were mentioned his name was noticeably left out. It hurt him, and us. Our son seems to have found his niche in the large church we have been visiting for several months as the youth group has welcomed him with open arms. He has been blossoming there as he has seen other people his age loving You, and it has blessed us to see it.

Our daughter is having a more difficult time. She enjoys the classes where we are, and the friends she has made, but the church we left was all she has known since birth. She misses it, even though she tries to understand that daddy had to leave it.

My wife would have had us leave 3 years ago, and I should have listened to her. The church had already been changing for a year at that time. Not changing in method, but changing in what I believe were core beliefs. From that time on I was on the outside. I resigned a leadership position because I did not want to be hypocritical. I did not think I should be in leadership if I did not believe in the direction the leadership was taking. I told myself I would just be a laymen with a different opinion on some things, but still support the church I loved where I could. Sadly I was included less and less until I knew nothing that was going on, nor did I feel particularly welcomed. The past several months, and the un-named reference to me on the website, have shown how little we have been missed.

So here we are without family nearby, and just a few of the dearest friends for which I am thankful. My wife and I came to the conclusion that if we are ever going to know anyone at the large church we have been visiting we would have to start attending some Sunday School classes, and we have been to three. While we don't know anyone the folks seem friendly enough. It is hard to feel so alone, and I am so thankful for the band - an oasis of normality for me.

I just wanted you to know that I trust you Father, and I love you. I know that you love me. You see not only these things, but the other trials - personal, financial, etc - that we are going through as well. Make me a better husband, and a better dad. Let me know your presence in every turn of life. Thank you for my family, and our few but dear friends. Thank you that we are clothed and fed.

Hold me O God when it is cold outside.

The family that sings together....

I am very proud of my daughter!

Last month she sang in a talent show at school. For her song she chose a song that I wrote called "God Is Love" , and asked me to play for her. She sang it beautifully, and the audience responded well. It was a good night.

Last week she was invited to bring her dad and sing "that song" when the school band participates in an event this April with several other school bands in another city about an hour and a half away. Along with the school band we will be spending the night in a hotel, and then performing the next day.

Those in charge of the event asked for sheet music for the song so I had to explain to them that I can't read music. I was however able to midi my Keyboard into the PC and print sheet music of what I had played in real time.

How proud I am of her, and so glad to share music with her!

Band practice and a Free Music Download!

Sometimes a song is more than melody. Sometimes it can embody our best expressions, and our best emotions. A song that means something to you has the abilty to lift you higher, make colors more colorful, and make you glad for the moment.

This Feb 10 I will have beeen gone from our church of 14 years for 6 months. I know..I keep telling myself I'll write about it sometime.

Two of our band members, husband and wife guitar and keyboard, attend this church still. ONE ACCORD was a band before I attended "our" church, and has never been comprised soley of people who attended that church, although at one time as many as 4 out of 5 of us attended that same church. Now 3 of us don't, including 2 of us who used to. While ONE ACCORD was always a seperate entity, those of us who attended the same church also put our talents to use within the "church band". Our current drummer in the band left the church several years ago, and with my leaving this last August, I understand the "church band" is not what it used to be. There is a cohesiveness that comes from years of playing together, as well as talent, that is not easily replaced.

It is hard to leave a church where you have put so much time and effort into building something.

This week at band practice the two ONE ACCORD members who are still attending there were lamenting how much the church had changed, and how the music had changed with it. I looked at the drummer and said "lets play one for old times sake". We began playing a rendition of Psalm 3 that was a favorite at church, and the biggest smile broke out on our sister as she played keyboard, and I am certain she had tears in her eyes. It is a good song. A song I had not played in 6 months, and a song that felt good to play.

The enitire practice in fact was very good, and another songe we are very excited about is an original we have made available as a free download at our music store. The song is called "Trust and Believe", and all who read are welcome to it....FREE! Scroll down the list of original songs until you get to it, and if you have time listen to samples of the others.

In this time of seeking where the Lord would have our family become part of an assembly ONE ACCORD is a personal retreat that I thank God for.


"Trust and Believe" by ONE ACCORD is written by Gabriel Hoskins, and arranged by ONE ACCORD.

ONE ACCORD is a music ministry dedicated to the Gospel of Love and Peace -
the Gospel of Jesus Christ!

Sure confidence

I love these words from Charles Spurgeon -

"I do not know how some people, who believe that a Christian can fall from grace, manage to be happy. It must be a very commendable thing in them to be able to get through a day without despair. If I did not believe the doctrine of the final perseverance of the saints, I think I should be of all men the most miserable, because I should lack any ground of comfort. I could not say, whatever state of heart I came into, that I should be like a well-spring of water, whose stream fails not; I should rather have to take the comparison of an intermittent spring, that might stop on a sudden, or a reservoir, which I had no reason to expect would always be full.

I believe that the happiest of Christians and the truest of Christians are those who never dare to doubt God, but who take His Word simply as it stands, and believe it, and ask no questions, just feeling assured that if God has said it, it will be so. I bear my willing testimony that I have no reason, nor even the shadow of a reason, to doubt my Lord, and I challenge Heaven, and earth, and hell, to bring any proof that God is untrue. From the depths of hell I call the fiends, and from this earth I call the tried and afflicted believers, and to Heaven I appeal, and challenge the long experience of the blood-washed host, and there is not to be found in the three realms a single person who can bear witness to one fact which can disprove the faithfulness of God, or weaken His claim to be trusted by His servants. There are many things that may or may not happen, but this I know shall happen-

"He shall present my soul, Unblemish'd and complete, Before the glory of His face, With joys divinely great."

All the purposes of man have been defeated, but not the purposes of God. The promises of man may be broken-many of them are made to be broken-but the promises of God shall all be fulfilled. He is a promise-maker, but He never was a promise-breaker; He is a promise-keeping God, and every one of His people shall prove it to be so. This is my grateful, personal confidence,

"The Lord will perfect that which concerneth me"-unworthy me, lost and ruined me. He will yet save me;
and-

"I, among the blood-wash'd throng, Shall wave the palm, and wear the crown, And shout loud victory."

I go to a land which the plough of earth hath never upturned, where it is greener than earth's best pastures, and richer than her most abundant harvests ever saw. I go to a building of more gorgeous architecture than man hath ever builded; it is not of mortal design; it is

"a building of God, a house not made with hands, eternal in the Heavens."

All I shall know and enjoy in Heaven, will be given to me by the Lord, and I shall say, when at last I appear before Him-

"Grace all the work shall crown Through everlasting days; It lays in Heaven the topmost stone, And well deserves the praise." "

Amen